Doing well/not so well

I'm pleased to say that, so far, I'm doing well with several resolution goals. I have yet to have any soda this month and it's been an almost Herculean effort on several occasions. There are a couple of cans of Coke in the door of my fridge that taunt me mercilessly but, instead of just taking the easy way out and putting them in the basement pantry, I'm choosing to leave them there so that I feel like I've earned this one when the month is over. I've been drinking a lot more in the way of green tea and hot chocolate when I get to the point where I just can't bear the thought of drinking any more water so I'm getting by. I had Mike pick up some flavored mineral water at the grocery store last night so we'll see if that's any good.

Speaking of trying new things, I did try two foods that were new to me this month. Mike and I went out on a lunch date to Boston Market and I tried his barbecue chicken. A couple days after that I made Eli sweet potatoes (from an instant Betty Crocker mix he'd insisted that I buy him the last time we were at Target) and tried two bites of those. They were not fantastic but it was really encouraging that I was able to push myself to do it when alone. My friend Stephanie and I had lunch at Psycho Suzi's yesterday and she suggested that I might like deviled eggs but I wasn't even close to being adventurous enough to take a shot at those. I know to really be successful in overcoming my weird aversion to trying new things I need to employ a bit of cognitive behavioral therapy but that's definitely easier said than done. I wish I could set myself some sort of reward to motivate me to really make great strides but I can't think of one single thing that would motivate me and is also realistically attainable. I'm pretty sure that meeting RuPaul would motivate me to try all manner of things but that isn't likely to happen.

I did make some great headway on my running goals though due to a realization last Sunday. I went out to do my long jog/walk, which is almost a perfect four mile route, and discovered that, if I don't listen to the voices in my head that tell me it's time to walk, I can jog the whole thing without walking at all. Now, don't get me wrong. These aren't voices that are screaming "OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP THIS HURTS." It's simply the worldview that I've had for a long time that I'm simply not a "runner." I've always been a "reader," prone to sedentary activities and viewed as nonathletic. Once I worked through the mindset that I "couldn't" move that long without walking some of the way, I was able to just jog it out and ended up at right around 12.5 minutes a mile. So, progress! I wanted to run outside more than I did last week due to alternating cold and/or precipitation and this week appears to be starting off the same. Just because I have run 3.1 miles in single digit temps doesn't mean I want to do it regularly!

Now, for the not so well. I need to get started on my crafty project for January and I still have "mom dates" to do with all three children as well as a museum to visit. This weekend doesn't lend itself well to crossing any of those off the list since I have a pastoral care training most of the morning and into the early afternoon on Saturday and Mike and I are going to use Crowd Cut deals at a shooting range for AK-74s. (The irony of spending Saturday at a church and Sunday shooting automatic weapons is not lost on me.) I should still be able to fit something in with Ada this Saturday evening. My initial plan for an activity with her was to take her to Edina to Little Enchantments, which is a miniatures store. I think she'd love looking at the dollhouses and other tiny things but they're only open until 5 PM and she still naps most weekends. Saturday the 26th would work for that after a membership committee meeting I have at 9 AM so perhaps that's what I'll plan on. Otherwise, she's still impressed with a trip to Perkins with just mom so I can always fall back on that.

Holiday schedule hangover

As I begin to ease back into our regular schedule, I find that I'm facing "normal" life with great reluctance. Ada is off to school for most of the day, which leaves the house feeling somewhat empty and far more quiet than normal. Dance classes for all three kids will soon return Tuesday to it's "least favorite day of the week" position. Classes begin for me again January 10th (Ethics, the last of the required courses in the Communication degree program) and I'm less than enthusiastic. I love the topic and enjoy the instructor, but will miss the freedom of not having constant deadlines looming and even less free time to read. During the two weeks between when my last Winter class ended and the beginning of Spring classes, I'll have read five books. My brain has been thrilled with the opportunity to read for pleasure and I've managed to make a tiny dent in my "to read" pile. No extra space on my bookshelves yet, but I'll keep plugging away at it. (Also, I'm proud to report that, as of this writing, I have yet to purchase any new books this year.)

One of the reasons I've increased the amount of free time I seem to have is a concentrated effort to stay the hell off Facebook. I've done fairly well, but end up feeling like I'm missing out on what everyone else is up to. I also feel like I've been using Facebook (and the dreaded Timeline) as a record of what I've done during the year. Did you know I sprained my wrist Christmas Eve? Probably not since I didn't post it to Facebook and it kind of felt weird not to. (It's healing, no big. I fell while putting on a boot in too much of a hurry.) Since Facebook ends up being a gigantic time sink when I do venture out there, I'm going to try to use this space as a way to record the things I would normally post there. This way, it's actually blogged with detail instead of just a microblog entry with little elaboration.  I'll also be forced to actually get together with people or compose emails to *GASP* communicate with people. Four of the five weeks of Ethics are online so I can't complain I don't have the time to get out of the house. Running the Polar Dash 5k January 1st makes it so I can no longer complain about going out in the cold either, not that I usually need much motivation to be around other adults.

It was a whopping ONE degree Farenheit outside.

 I do have to say that I'm already regretting the decision to go an entire month without soda. I didn't have any yesterday or today so I'm just going to go ahead and try to get that out of the way in January. It occurred to me that it might make sense to choose the shortest month of the year as opposed to one of the longer ones, but I just want it done. To make up for the missing caffeine I managed a cup of green tea. It wasn't the same, or what I wanted at the time, but it was enough to make it through the afternoon conscious. I'm still interested in trying to learn to drink coffee so any suggestions or recommendations are welcome.

2013 Challenges & Resolutions

Boosting Energy

• Run an 11 minute mile
• Go one month with no soda
• Run a 10k

Boosting Spirituality

• Visit five new churches
• Practice openness, vulnerability & patience

Boosting Parenting

• Take each child on one "mom date" per month
• Complete six volunteer opportunities which involve the children
• Visit one museum per month

Boosting Finance

• Spend no money on anything other than necessities for one month
• Buy NO books for an entire year

Boosting Relationships

• Write to my grandmothers a minimum of once a month
• Blog/journal a minimum of once a week

Boosting Play

• Complete one creative project per month (e.g. knitting, writing, sewing)
•  Try a minimum of 12 new foods in a year (single item or in a dish):

           January: BBQ chicken, sweet potatoes
           February:

• Reduce household possessions by @ 25%

2013 Reading Goals

25 books, including: 

• My Year With Eleanor, a memoir, by Noelle Hancock  
• 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess, by Jen Hatmaker
• The Winter of Our Disconnect: How Two Totally Wired Teenagers (and a Mother Who Slept With her iPhone) Pulled the Plug on Their Technology and Lived to Tell the Tale, by Susan Maushart
• Less: Accomplishing More by Doing Less, by Marc Lesser 
• Happier at Home: Kiss More, Jump More, Abandon a Project, Read Samuel Johnson, and My Other Experiments in the Practice of Everyday Life, by Gretchen Rubin 

The Power of Blogger Compels You...

I'm compelled to blog on a fairly frequent basis and it doesn't happen for a variety of reasons. Most of them are not very good ones and involve time wasting (e.g. Facebook, playing Kingdom Rush (LOVE this game!), & almost any show that Netflix carries from TLC) but things still continue to be hectic with school, kids' activities, and finding time with friends. I started training to participate in a 5k at the end of August and, since I quickly experienced positive changes from regular activity, I've kept it up. Recently (as in this last Sunday), I joined our local LA Fitness and met with a personal trainer to discuss my health and fitness goals. I spent about half of my hour with him talking and then he took me through a workout focusing on arms and core. (Normally it would have included legs too but we both agreed it would be best not to do that since I run the 5k this Saturday.) As I write, the muscles in my arms still burn and are sore and twisting certain directions ignites my mid-section. This is not an unpleasant thing, however, and I committed to working with a trainer twice a week and am really looking forward to well and truly making this year my best to date on ALL levels.

I've been keeping up with my "Go somewhere/Do something new each month" resolution so far (July, August, and September will be updated soon) and will meet that goal for the year. I hope to kick it up a notch in the next year but I'm not sure how I'll manage that. There's a world of new out there so I'm not too concerned. Let's see if my other resolutions are being met... Let's start with the Energy category.

Boosting Energy: I'm certainly not meeting my sleeping goal, nor have I been absent from the house for 24 hours each month. (As I successfully meet some of the other goals, being away for an entire day is proving to be less important to me than when I made these goals at the end of 2011.) I've maintained meal planning and don't have problems with not repeating meals.

Boosting Spirituality: Uh, no. I haven't done with one of those things on anything resembling a regular basis. I am managing to get to and be more involved with MSUS again though so that's something.

Boosting Parenting: I haven't met these goals entirely but they weren't as full of fail as the previous category. I still have time to finish photo books so there's a chance...

Boosting Finance: This category has been a much more successful one. We paid off both the window loan and the credit card so I'm feeling very good about that. I haven't tried cash only for a month yet but I was recently encouraged by a friend that does this and am considering it for November. It just seems like such a foreign idea to actually use paper money after having a debit card for so long that it seems fiddly and irritating. We'll see I suppose.

Boosting Relationships: This has been the most productive and successful of all of the categories in my opinion and I feel like I'm ending the year with a wonderful, supportive group of friends. I need to make a better, and sustained, effort with my long distance friends and I could facilitate that in large part with regularly updating this blog so they have some idea of what I'm up to. Facebook is all well and good for little daily things, but it doesn't lend itself well to something as long as this post is becoming.

Boosting Play: Also another really successful category that I've already spent some time discussing. To my dismay, a monthly drag night has not come to fruition and I blame that on myself as I've had opportunity but was usually lax in making it happen. I have enjoyed reruns of RuPaul's Drag Race though so I haven't been in complete drag withdrawal.

So, good! That's a pretty decent update of where I'm at on my resolutions. This isn't at all what I intended to write when I sat down with the laptop but here it is in its entirety.

Get off the internet!

That's what I've been doing lately and I feel like I've doubled the amount of work I'm getting done every day. I literally don't sit idle for more than 15 - 20 minutes at a time during my "work day" and it's been revolutionary. I feel like I've said this before but it's amazing every time I get back around to realizing it.



Anyway! I made the trip to Cedar Rapids, IA last weekend to see Alexis Mateo and it was super awesome. With horrible rain and thunderstorms starting right before the show did, it was a rather small crowd. This turned out to be a great thing for those of us who braved the weather since we were granted a decent amount of time to visit with Alexis during the meet and greet. She was SO nice and I didn't freak out nearly as much as expected to even though I was so wildly excited to see her again.



I'm really looking forward to Sharon Needles (shown above) this Friday night in Des Moines. WHOO! The show is 21+ and tickets were pre-sale so I'm happy to know that it won't be full of teenagers (Sorry 'bout it little people! I was once young too. You'll live.) and hopefully not too over crowded. I have no idea if there's a meet and greet after this show but I'd LOVE to meet her and grab a photo too. I'm expecting her to take the title on Monday's season finale of Drag Race so it'll will be an extra special show to see her so close to when she officially wins.

Prompted by some rabid internal motivation, I've spent most of this week cleaning, organizing, and getting rid of things. I'm all about having more open space and less mess to clean up and, so far, I'm really pleased with the progress that's been made. My house is starting to get that "really clean" echoing sound, which I absolutely love. It's no where near spartan or anything and that isn't my goal. People (and cats) live here and it will always look that way. I just want to get to the point where the house is full of nothing but useful things that we all love and couldn't imagine parting with. The kids and I have been working in their rooms and the playroom and they've been blowing me away with how well they've been doing letting things go. I expected to have to fight for every inch but, so far, that hasn't been the case. We're getting down toward the end of what they just kind of liked so we'll be getting into some harder decisions soon. It's my goal to unload about 50 - 60% of the stuff in our house so I also have some work cut out for ME. Mike doesn't give a crap about 99% of what's here so, if we have too much stuff, that's on me. (I also realize that one of the reasons the kids have so many toys is because of me too. I'm really wishing I had been better about that now.)

Speaking of organization, I'm hosting a meal planning party at my house from 10:30 AM to 1:30 PM on April 28th. There will be childcare and lunch provided if you want to come. I sent out an invitation to those who I thought might be interested on Facebook but it's entirely possible I missed someone or would be surprised about your interest. Let me know if you're interested in coming and need my address.

I received my final grade in my first class, Intro to Communication, and it was a very solid 'A'. Whoo! Not a bad way to start off going back to school. My next class starts tonight and is Interpersonal Communication. The three chapters I had to read for tonight were really interesting so I'm looking forward to these next five weeks. Following this class, I have almost a MONTH off before Summer session starts. June, July, and part of August will bring Intro to World Media and Communication in Organizations. Introduction to World Media is online for all but the first session so that will be a big change. I actually like getting out of the house for class and having it happen in a separate place.

This Sunday I'll be using a Groupon for two hours of time at an archery range and it should be pretty exciting. Hopefully I get to use a big ass bow and can get a picture taken with it. Yay weapons!

I wish I made more time to read for fun. I miss it.

After a week of one frustrating, disgusting, or horrible thing after another, I'm having another "Everything's amazing!" kind of week and it's prompted me to actually get a blog post completed. (I started one back toward the end of March during my "spring break" week from school but it probably won't ever see publication as it's a little dated now.)

This Thursday (the 12th) I have the final session of my first class at Bethel and I can't believe how quickly the time has flown by. Normally classes are only five weeks but this one ran for seven as we had a week off for spring break and one for Easter. So far I'm very pleased with the grades I've earned on my assignments and feel fairly good about my final speech at this point. My topic is Mr.Rogers and he turned out to be a lot more interesting than I'd first anticipated when I chose the topic. Since I won't be able to integrate all the information from the article into my speech, I'd like to share this link with all of here so you don't miss out on it:

15 Reasons Mr.Rogers Was the Best Neighbor Ever



Awesome. I know all of my classes won't be as enjoyable as this first one but, if the work loads are somewhat comparable, I should be able to swing it.

I've also been slowly improving my organization and time management skills again. My house, at this moment, has been really clean for over 24 hours. We're talking that weird, echoing type of clean and it pleases me to no end. When it was just two adults living here I had no problem keeping it company ready at all times. With the advent of the children, that became more of a challenge. I'm hoping to maintain and have this be the new normal so we'll see what it's like in a week. I'm going to be doing a bit of traveling in the next two weeks so I'm sure that, while mommy is away, the other four people who live here will do their best to undo all my efforts.

"Where are you traveling?" you may ask. IOWA. That's right friends, I'm headed south to enjoy the (soon to be planted) corn fields and wide open spaces of our socially progressive neighbor. Why? Drag queens of course! (Am I ever really motivated to travel for any other reason?) This Saturday night one of my favorites from Season 3 of RuPaul's Drag Race, Alexis Mateo, will be appearing at Belle's Basix in Cedar Rapids. Next Friday night, my absolute favorite from Season 4 (the current season airing Monday night's on LOGO or Tuesday morning's at the above link), Sharon Needles, will be appearing at The Garden in Des Moines. (She's originally from Newton, IA which is very close to Des Moines.) SO EXCITED. I'm doubly lucky these shows are happening where they are in Iowa as a friend (and fellow Hardee's alum) from high school lives in Cedar Rapids with her wife and is as excited for the shows as I am. So hooray for seeing old friends, hooray for travel, and hooray for drag! The only downside? I already have plans for this Sunday afternoon and I'd be cutting it really close to make it on time. I can't decide if all the rushing around will really be worth it or not. As of now, I'm leaning toward yes but we'll see how the rest of the week goes.

I'm also trying to keep working away at my goal/resolution list for this year. I've done really well with some things but haven't thought too much about others. In April, I've scheduled the first monthly get together for the year so far. Oops. Well, at least it's out there. It'll be at my house on April 28th from 10:30 AM - 1:30 PM and you're more than welcome to attend if I didn't specifically invite you on Facebook. (Text/call/email me for details if you need them.) I'll be serving lunch and talking a little bit about how I do my monthly meal planning since quite a few people have had questions about how that works. I'm already looking forward to trying to do something fun in May when it's warmer but haven't really come up with anything yet. If I can manage something every month from here on out, I'll be pretty pleased with 9/12 months.

Another interesting development has been my return to regular attendance at the local Unitarian church, MSUS. Since I'm on my own as far as taking the kids to church goes, I've been really unmotivated to try and do it on my own until they were much more independent. I have no idea why, but I suddenly decided a couple weeks ago that they had reached a certain capability and it was time. (It also helps that I've had people gently poking and prodding me to get my ass back in a pew over the past few years.) The first week back I was handed maracas to play during the first hymn and the kids acted as if they'd been there every Sunday since birth. There was also no hesitation about going up front during the children's story and not even a backward glance when I dropped them off at their Sunday school classrooms. I'm also excited to see that the promises of many other young families with children were not exaggerations. Yay! Thanks for not giving up on me all you tenacious UUs! ;)

I'm looking forward to getting things going in the garden in the coming weeks and being able to be outside for long stretches of time. In two entirely separate posts, I hope to discuss with you my recent appreciation for my children and the mourning I've been doing as I realize they seriously aren't babies anymore and that phase is done and gone for me on a permanent basis. I'm also halfway through the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead and it's renewed my motivation to create more of our food from scratch and try to eat as locally and seasonally as possible. The warmer weather coming will be helpful for that but it's still going to be a challenge since prepackaged convenience foods are just so darn convenient. I'm up for the challenge though because, as you well know, there always has to be something going on for me!

Copping to Kindergarten

(It's not a tumor but I still don't feel very good about it...)

So.

Ada has Kindergarten registration & open house this Monday and it's become rather hard to ignore as the date looms impossibly close. (WHERE did my baby go? It feels to me like I just birthed her yesterday.) I do thank all of you that have listened to my incessant worrying over having to decide whether or not to send her and I think that good discussion has been had. As of now, we're planning to stick with the "play it by ear" school of thinking and see how she likes it come fall. It's my gut feeling that she will absolutely love having a gaggle of friends her own age that she sees on a regular basis. She loves learning and, heck, Kindergarten is pretty much awesome fun time as far as I can remember. Also, I've been assured by those of you familiar with the current state of public schools that not only is Hayes a good school, it's an excellent one. I've also been reassured multiple times that the things that I worry about happening to her will more than likely be a non-issue. What am I worried about? Why, I'm so glad you asked!

The biggest thing for me is that I worry about Ada being bored and getting into trouble. We've been working on Kindergarten curriculum at home this year and Ada is privileged to be a quick learner. (I know a lot of people are quick to say "My child is SO smart..." but that's not what I'm saying here. All I'm saying is that she's quick to pick things up. I don't have anyone else to compare her to so I honestly have no clue how she stacks up against other kids her age.) Mike and I were also quick learners and, when I was starting elementary school, I often got in trouble for talking during work time in class. Was I a bad kid? No. I was just done with my work way before my classmates and had nothing else to do. So, it was either horribly bored or in trouble for me until my parents got wise and started sending me to school with workbooks to do additional work in if I finished before the rest of the class. I really don't want Ada's teacher to peg her as a problem child instead of a quick learner, but I also don't want to come off as neurotic and tell the teacher about my concerns before school even starts. Ada's not a bad kid but she's certainly spirited (and not in the "spirited as a polite word for asshole" sense either) and not shy about making her opinion known. I don't like thinking that public school may try to force her to be more conforming and less exuberant and wildly creative.

Let me just put out there, for those of you who may not know, that I'm a worrier. I worry about literally everything. It's not in an unhealthy, keeps me from taking action way. I just tend to run through every possible scenario that could possibly occur before something new happens. (After taking Strengths Finder for class, I'm now writing that off as part of being labeled Strategic. Ha!) I worry Ada will be scared because she's never, EVER been away from me for that long every day on a regular basis. Hours at the elementary school run from 9:10 AM - 3:45 PM and, I have to say, those are REALLY reasonable to me. I'd been imagining that we'd all have to get used to a completely different morning routine once she was in school but, nope. I don't know that I think we'd even really have to do much in the way of rushing either. She's usually up around 8 AM so that's plenty of time to get dressed and eat since I'll be driving her to school. Driving her to school EVERY day you ask? Oh HELL yes. I might be able to get used to the idea of her going to public school and not being with me 24/7 anymore but there's no way that's happening AND I have to put her on a school bus alone too. NOT HAPPENING.

Honestly people, it would get ugly.

Yes, yes, I'm sure she'd be fine. Yes, I KNOW I rode the bus when I was in Kindergarten and blah, blah, blah. Believe me, I'm aware that the whole thing comes down to issues *I* have. I get that. It still doesn't mean I'm putting my baby on a bus. When school gets out it's usually nap time around these parts so I may have to rearrange that a little bit in order to accommodate picking her up as well. Perhaps we'll all be surprised and I'll suddenly not be a crazy person about it and will let Ada bask in her newly acquired independence. (I almost wrote that without laughing. So proud.) Odds are good though that I'll be packing her siblings up twice a day to make the trip just down the street twice a day.

Is there anything I look forward to about her starting school? Hrm... I like the idea of talking to her about her day and hearing about what she learns. I like thinking about having a bulletin board with just a shit ton of her art projects (which I'd be surprised with on her arrival home) hanging on it like it's a wall at the Louvre. I like the idea of hearing her talk about and have little friends over. I like the idea of meeting other parents who live near here and have children the same age as mine.

But, after considering the positives, I go right back to worrying. What if someone picks on her? What if someone bullies her and she punches the kid in the face? (I have no idea how I'd handle that. High five or loss of privileges? I suppose it would depend on the situation.) What if there are "mean girls" and they make my little girl sad/feel bad about herself? What if I want to punch those little girls in the face but instead get in a brawl with their obviously horrible parents? It's a lot to think about people!

I don't remember who among you gave me this gem of advice but I find myself thinking of it a lot lately (and I'm paraphrasing): If you have a good kid, it doesn't matter if they go to public school or not. They'll be a good kid either way. I'm pretty sure I have Miss Mary G. to thank for that during our discussion at Super Target but my brain is feeling mushy right now. (I was up early for my dance class and then got caught up on cleaning and did homework. Excuses, I have them!) So, there. I'm sure I'll have more to say about things once I've actually been to the school and have met the teachers. OH! That reminds me. When looking up the Kindergarten teachers at Hayes, the first one I came across was Ms. Mary Borg. Yes, that's right: BORG. Are you KIDDING me Universe? I really can't appreciate the humor there.